Firstly dear readers I'm giving myself a slap on the back of the wrists for my lack of presence last week. Naughty naughty gossip girl. As we're approaching peak season I've had a severe case of the Ibiza worker's work hard, party hard, burnout. If you get struck, it's bad. As a result of an abundance of work, with little, or no sleep, and having so much fun you simply outright forget to look after yourself properly, your brain turns to mush, your body lead, and you're good for nothing. You know you must look like s**t when 2 Many DJs tell you to go home and go to bed! Never fear however chaps, I'm back, I did as I was told, and am rested, refreshed, and raring to go...
I popped to see my 2 Many DJs chums at Amnesia on Friday night who were playing for I Want My MTV. Now, I'm not going to sound like a broken record raving at how brilliant they are, but it is always a pleasure to see them in action. It was a spectacular line-up, and really fab to witness a DJ set from James Murphy (former mastermind of LCD Soundsystem) who did a great 70's, disco, funk set that practically transported the terrace into something very reminiscent of what you'd have expected to hear in Studio 54. I was also extremely impressed with the performance from Beardyman, who I've wanted to see for a long time now, and was on first. The sounds he produces vocally are incredible. Chatting with Dave Dewaele in 2 Many DJ's dressing room, we agreed that a lot of people in club mustn't have realised that the fat beats, electronic harmonies and club thumps are all sounds produced from Beardyman's own voice. He then samples his own vocals and mixes these over said beats LIVE – amazing!
Now, moving on, I'm going to give you one of the best tips to experience the VIP treatment in Ibiza you can ask for. You too can divulge in the same kind of treatment that Kate Moss, Sienna Miller, Jade Jagger or any of the other celebs who so frequently come to Ibiza are accustomed to. To do it in style, what you really need is to ‘Taste Ibiza'. Taste Ibiza is a VIP concierge service that can cater for your every desire during your Ibiza stay. From organising villa's, boats, cars, tables and guest list into the super clubs, it can all be taken care of and for a really reasonable price.
Founders and promoters Roy Burdett and Juliette Clee were kind enough to offer me the VIP treatment and show me what they're all about for F*** Me I'm Famous at Pacha last week. And boy, do they know how to look after you! Being one of the Pacha's most popular night's and despite having been informed that the club was a sell out two week ago, this proved no dilemma for Roy, who contacted me a few hours before the club opened to arrange a meeting time at the VIP door. Not only this, he had me picked up from my apartment in a luxury 4 x 4 and dropped right outside the VIP door where he was waiting for me! The queue for the VIP tables stretched further than you could see, but before I could begin to moan, Roy had whisked me passed the waiting hopefuls and into the club. No wait, no hassle, no way... yes way hay!
Guided through the various security guarded check points, I'm lead to find myself front and centre at one of the many VIP tables hosted by Taste Ibiza. This particular table also hosted by Roy was occupied by a certain well known jockey who makes the trip every summer. As he was ‘off duty' I'll be kind enough to let him remain nameless... this time! But he and his friends were surely having a whale of a time, as was I, champagne glass in hand, enjoying the best view of Pacha one could ask for, sweetie darhling.
Out of nowhere fireworks go off and smoke from a machine fills the club – it's time for the main event – David Guetta. He takes to the decks, there's deafening cheers, and what looks like a million cameras pop up over the heads of the clubbers on the dancefloor. Everyone's trying to get that precious holiday snapshot of the superstar DJ they clearly adore. He's not my musical cup of tea at all, but as his first track electrifies the room, everyone goes completely nuts. Perhaps it's something to do with the many complementary drinks I've had, or the fully hyped and charged atmosphere, but I too get swept away with all the excitement. Myself and many people from in the VIP area are requesting that their chairs (that they've paid so much money for) are removed, to make more space so that we can bust some moves and dance the night away.
The VIP is full to the brim but I'd rather be here then on the dance floor, which is so unbelievably rammed that most people are having to adapt their dance moves to hand jives, or for the more sleazy señores, seizing the opportunity to rub themselves up against potential conquests.
I look for my hostess with the mostest, who is never too far away, seeing to another one of his tables who also look like they are having the time of their lives! He seems to spend his entire night
shaking hands, hugging, kissing and smiling... Before you know it it's 6am, the club is still as busy as when I arrived, with the energy level's remaining consistently un-dipped. But this gossiping
gal has started to fatigue. As if by magic Roy pops up again and tells me that my carriage awaits. I'm whisked out, back into my 4 x 4 and before I know what's hit me, I'm back in my apartment
again. As I slip into my greying cotton nightie and remove the remaining traces of my make-up, this Cinderella has well and truly turned back into a pumpkin.
Until next week (I promise!) Gossip Girl x